Spirit Horse, again!
“so how was it this time?!”
well yes! i’m back from Spirit Horse. well i’am still there. well you understand what i mean! and I need to write here what i still feel about it today.
it was indeed softer than last year : no fading, no trauma, mud was ok, 10 deg water was ok, all this was already understood, intergrated, deeply in my body.
mine and my children’s too.
as soon as we have arrived, Tâm jumped out of the car, runing in the wild with her arms in the sky, shouting :
I’M FREE I’M FREE I’M FREEEEEEE
(could not hear the end of it…)
Only that, and my heart was already bursting with tears and joy. yes, it was softer and simpler than last year. but i have learnt soooo much, about myself and the universe. may i tell you?
nb : ok, so i’ll tell you in different posts, because it is taking 400 pages and it may be tooooo long :p
so the first thing i have learnt is that
i love being naked
hahahahaha! i know, put it like that, it is not interesting. at all. who cares?! but i have learnt something new about my body : i love it. actually, you know it, it has been a long time already, but i felt the fontiers of what i call my body are expanding.
last summer, people talked a lot about “body positive”. i am very happy about it, but it is not really what i would like to share. the beauty of the body, of my body, does not interest me anymore. it took me sometime to understand its contours, welcome its tubular androgynous shapes (no breast, no waist, no hips, no but… so boring! hahaha), when i was a teenager, i even wanted to have my shins be sawn to make them longer (you “just” had to stick something between the 2 pieces of bones)(… wtf!); but mostly, it took me time to feel my body. and when i arrive at Spirit Horse, something pops up right away. i want to be naked.
so, well, i am still not a naturist and i don’t share my nudity with other members of the community (only on the web… hahahah), but who knows… it may change.
so, i now know, nudity is not only to show your body, it is just to “live” your body, that is very natural. even universal. birth suit makes it possible to be born again! to feel alive!
like dancing. I told you about a dance, 5 rythms, that is taught by Alex with her husband Joe and son Jake playing live percussions. this dance is “intuitive” and free, and meditative. it is based on 5 different rythms of the body, ranking for calm stilness to pure transe. you don’t learn moves, or specific technics, it is more about feeling the present moment in accordance with what is being played live. tâm came this year with me. at the begining she was panicked : we arrived late and seeing hippies dancing around a fire in a round wooden house can be challenging for city people! “but what do i do?!” “whatever you want! just close your eyes!” we “woke up” 1 h30 later, totally wiped out, profoundly happy and grateful. so moved that dance can take you to these places, within yourself! so beautiful!
Because actually, beyond nudity, beyond Spirit Horse, it is a tremendous learning to live your body with love. let alone that love expands! i can’t have a better wish for my daughter (no threat so far for leo) and you all!